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Childfreedom!
February 28, 2009
I ran across a website yesterday while reading one of my blogs that I frequent and I have to say that this is a new thing for me. I don't exactly live under a rock, but I have to honestly say that I had never heard about this new underground group of people who are angry, fed up, and downright inconvenienced by people who have children and the children themselves.
I of course am not going to lose much sleep over the rantings of these particular blogs/websites but one post in particular actually made me laugh. This person is so upset over what she considers the "choice" of pregnancy. And she isn't talking about choice as in "pro-choice/abortion" but simply as "Yes! Paul and I chose to have children together, we CHOSE to have a family".
Here are the three articles that I picked out, but believe me there are many MANY articles on the one blog that delve deeper and deeper into her disgust of people who have or are having children. Childfreedom Blog , Parenthood doesn't lead to joy- Article. There is then an actually funny post on the same blog Uphappy Mothers which really made me laugh!
I will be the first to admit that I haven't slept well since I gave birth a year and a half ago, I will also tell you that I have days where I just wish that I could have 5 minutes to myself, and now that I am pregnant I can get very cranky. But I have NEVER regretted for one minute becoming a mother and if I did, do you think I would be pregnant again??? I don't think so.
I probably tell Jacob that I love him 100+ times a day, and give him even more kisses. What I miss the most about being a parent actually doesn't have ANYTHING to do with my decision to be a mother, it is the social aspect of being a full-time worker to now being a stay home mom who occasionally has no one over the age of 1 1/2 to talk to. But am I unhappy, HELL NO!
I guess the question is this? Do you have to have a smile plastered to your face 24/7 to be considered a happy mom? Do you have to never ever voice your frustration in order to be considered a happy mom? If this lady can complain about people who have children and she has the right to be "angry" or "discontent" with parents, aren't we as parents allowed to complain when we have had a bad day at home? Just because I chose to have children doesn't mean that my right to have a "bad day" has been taken away from me! But she seems to think that any discontent AT ALL instantly means that you as a mother have regretted your decision to be a parent.
I am a stay-at-home mom so THAT is my job. I know many many people who have bad days on the job and they tell me about it. I don't start a blog complaining about people who complain about their jobs.......how then do you categorize ALL MOMS as being unhappy. Does that mean I am allowed to categorize all people with jobs as unhappy people and that maybe they should choose to live a job-free life and that will fix their problems? She thinks that all mothers are unhappy and that they would be happy if they chose to live her life of being child-free...hhhmmmmm interesting.
I guess since I just went on a rant that makes me an unhappy mother.....I probably shouldn't have had kids! **just kidding** I think I am going to go look in on my sleeping son who I love more than life iteself! Good night everyone!!!
Alma Woodsey Thomas Art Project
2 years ago
6 comments:
How unbelievably ridiculous! Those people really must be unhappy! I mean, of all things to focus on, that is what they choose? We should leave them to wallow in thier own misery.
@James - I know what you mean about their misery, I hated even posting about it. I felt like it fueled their fires!
It's a choice though guys. I have children and they are fun. But at the end of the day it's a lifestyle choice some don't want. And at the end of the day it's more selfish to procreate than not as we live in a world with dwindling resources. Looking at the financial and environmental position our children head towards is scary. But I am one to admit that my hormones got the better of me. I just hope my children don't need to deal with the apocalypse, yes I am being over dramatic, perhaps, but at the moment there is a real possibility this could happen.
I think those child-free people only get annoyed because people query the decision to not have children, yet not the other way round. I also believe that they are made to feel bad for there decision and classed as selfish , which is odd as they have normally considered whether or not to procreate far more than your average parents. The child-free are statistically better educated than the childed which some may find threatening.
To conclude lets all try and be a little more understanding and accept ethically they ultimately are making a far more sensible choice for the sake of our own children and the planet. At the nd of th day the only way to have children ethically is to adopt. Now off to fend off the children! : )
@anoonymous -
First let me say that if you really read my post I never once said that they don't have a choice, but by having a choice they shouldn't ASSUME that all mothers are unhappy and that all parents are selfish. I could care less if they have children of their own just don't call me regretful just because I might occasionally have a day where things are 100% perfect and I might be down. THAT is what my post was about not whether they should have the choice or not.
i have 3 step-kids & 2 g-kids but don't have children of my "own". it was my choice in some ways (partly medical reasons) not to have kids because i'm selfish and enjoy our freedom to drop everything and just take off whenever we wish. that being said, i think those be are not only ridiculous but down right STUPID. i agree with james. can't they find something worthwhile to focus on?
@nonna - Like I said in response to the anonymous commenter, I never said "everyone" has to have kids. But I don't care about people not having kids,nor do I "assume" anything about them. I just felt like she was sterotyping or "assuming" things about all parents and I didn't like that. I too had many many health problems and until a blood disorder was found we were told we couldn't have kids. We were going to adopt until we tried being on bloodthinners during pregnancy and that solved the issue.
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